Immortal History Lessons 23

Immortal History Lessons 23

Errors in Fact

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Sydney had better luck this time with the airlines. She got a flight to New York and sat numb and miserable the entire way. She couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, and hated herself for putting the one thing she loved most in the world in danger. The only thing she could do at this point was stay as far away from him as possible so she couldn't get him hurt or put him in danger again.

She sleep walked her way through customs and getting her luggage and getting a taxi home. She stood inside the door to her apartment looking at the mess she'd left behind. She'd packed and rushed off and now she had to deal with the aftermath of not just the mess here but the mess she'd just made of her life.

She hid in bed for a day, telling herself it was jetlag. It wasn't and she knew it.

Then she remembered Sugar.

Well, she couldn't leave Duncan stuck with him. She owed it to him (both the hims) to at least get that squared.

So she showered, dressed (in jeans and a teeshirt), makeuped and headed for the dojo, determined to avoid any and all references to Methos and keep the conversation strictly on Sugar.

Duncan was in the dojo's main room, sparring with one of his students when he saw Sydney, he smiled brightly at her until he studied her face and didn't feel Methos' Buzz along with her. Quickly bowing out of the exercise, Duncan made his way over to her.

"What happened to two months?" Duncan asked cheerfully. "I thought Adam would of kept you up until the last day."

"Uhm, something came up. He had to see to things and I didn't want to impose on you any longer than necessary with Sugar. You do have Sugar?"

"Yeah, he's upstairs. Come on up, and I'll get his things." Duncan said, watching her carefully.

She followed along but he noticed the smile faded when she thought he wasn't looking. Sugar, however, knew she was coming before he saw her. He was dancing excitedly by the door to the elevator, his rotor butt on its highest setting.

"Oh, Sugar," Sydney said going to her knees and wrapping both arms around Sugar. Accepting the licks and whines he use to display his love of her. She buried her face against Sugar's neck.

Duncan watched her, feeling his heart sink. "The offer to talk is still an open one." He said calmly.

"Talk?" Sydney said after a moment. "Nothing to talk about. Really. How can I repay you for taking this poor boy in. And we didn't even warn you before hand. I am sorry about that."

"Sydney, where's Methos?" Duncan tried again.

"Paris. He had some things to see to."

Duncan sighed, so it came down to that. "Things with a sword?"

She nodded, keeping her eyes safely on Sugar. "Really, he's fine. Don't worry."

"I'm not worried about him. Methos can take care of himself." Duncan said, some of his annoyance at the older immortal showing in his voice.

"Yes, well, I expect that's true when he isn't mixed up with someone who puts him at greater risk. But it's sorted now, so don't worry. Sugar and I should go."

Shit! He hadn't expected the Old Man to be that stupid. "Have you talked to your landlord about keeping Sugar in the apartment?" Duncan asked, thinking fast.

"Oh! Well, no. No I haven't," she confessed. "It was a spur of the moment thing, ending up with him and I only just got in the other night so.. so, no."

"All right then. Why don't you leave Sugar here, just until you find out about the apartment." Duncan said casually. "I wouldn't mind keeping him for a few more days."

"Really? You're sure? I really didn't mean to impose. We just. well, didn't know what to do with him."

"Yeah, we're getting along great." Duncan assured. "Aren't we Sugar?" He asked, grabbing a treat from the stash he'd learned to keep by the couch if he didn't want a lap full of dog all through the movies he and Alanna watched.

Sugar's tail began to motor and he dropped his front end and raised his back to be ready to pounce on MacLeod.

Sydney smiled to see it. "Alanna doesn't mind?"

Duncan tossed the treat to Sugar quickly, avoiding disaster. "Alanna actually loved him on sight, it took me some getting used to it. I've never actually had a dog before. The only pet I owned was a horse."

"Oh. Well, I suppose it would be better if I talk to the landlord first. Win him over to the idea."

Duncan scratched Sugar behind the ears. "You know, Joe got back in town just before you did. He's playing a set tonight at the bar. You can come with me if you like, I'm sure he'd be happy to see you."

"Oh? I didn't know he'd come to New York. Well, I knew he'd left Paris, but not, strictly speaking, where he'd gone. He plays really well." Her smile, such as it was, faltered, remembering one song in particular.

Duncan grasped at the straw. "Do you want to go?"

"I... Yes, I'd like to thank him for his kindness. Sure. If I'm not in the way."

"Course not," Duncan said grabbing his coat. "I already fed Sugar so we can go over now." The Highlander said, overly cheerful as he herded her out the door, letting out a sigh of relief. If he couldn't get her to talk maybe Joe could.

"Now?" she gulped. "I thought you meant, uhm, later."

"Best time to get there is before it gets crowded. Prime choice seating that way." Duncan nudged, it seemed getting her out the door was the hardest part of this venture.

He'd taken her by surprise, and she was avoiding the whole subject of why she was there alone, so unless she was willing to talk about it, she didn't see a way she could avoid this gracefully. So she replied, "Oh, I see. Good idea." Surely she could have one drink and get out of there without too much effort.

"Door's that way, Sydney." Duncan pointed helpfully.

"Right. Thanks," she replied, blushing. She let him lead her out without a word. "He had a bar here before, Me... I heard. Same one?"

Duncan ignored the slip for her sake. "Mike runs the place while he's out of the country, less hassle for Joe so he can go back and forth when he's keeping an eye on me." Duncan said with a faint little smirk.

"He's your watcher," she said, pondering that. "Right. He seems more your friend."

"He's my friend first and my Watcher second. It's always been that way." Duncan laughed. "It's gotten us into a lot of trouble too, but we've managed."

"Yes, I imagine it would," Sydney replied, grateful for a topic that wasn't full of emotional landmines. "I'd like to hear the story some time, that is if you'd trust me not to blab it around."

"Well Immortals aren't plastered all over some historical journal yet, so you must be a pretty good at keeping secrets so far." Duncan joked.

She grinned ruefully. "History. The story only partly told, by men, and now women, who dare only tell the safe tales. They have to protect their tenure track, after all. The real stories are written up as fiction."

"Don't I know it." Duncan grumbled, remembering a rather embarrassing brush with fiction writers.

They ended up at Joe's bar with an understanding of what topics to stay away from and friendly banter flowing freely. Joe spotted them almost immediately while the band was tuning and only a smattering of patrons were finding seats. It took the length of the bar for Joe to figure out what was going on and it raised a weight off Duncan's shoulders when Joe's first words weren't what his had been.

"Hey Sydney, it's good to see you sweetheart." The Watcher said with a genuine grin and open arms for an expected hug.

She gave him the hug gratefully. Happily. He'd helped her considerably and she liked him too. "You look good. I hope you'll be happy in New York. But won't you miss Paris?"

Joe scoffed. "Without Mac in town it gets a little boring. Just paperwork and inventory sheets. Besides, a blues boy's gotta come home eventually."

"You ready for all that excitement again, Joe?" Duncan teased.

"Bring it on, brother." Joe said with a lighthearted grin.

They moved to a table, and Sydney found herself letting their banter wash over her, instead paying more attention to the music. She wondered how soon she could go home without arousing too much suspicion.

"What do you wanna drink, Sydney?" Joe asked, pulling her out from the spectator's box.

"Oh I don't know. Beer is good. Thanks."

"I'll get it," Duncan offered, a glance at Joe.

Joe gave a grateful nod. "Whiskey for me, Mac."

As the Highlander walked off, Joe turned a knowing look on Sydney. "So..."

"So.." she repeated, suddenly looking a lot like a terrified kid.

"You gonna tell me or do I have to set Mac on you again? Out of the two of us, I think you got a better chance of me understanding from a mortal perspective." Joe said simply. "And I know the Old Man better."

She glanced at Joe out of the corner of her eye. "Nothing much to tell, really. I couldn't handle the whole Game thing. Besides, he needs to concentrate and I got in the way of that."

"Yeah, well that bullshit talk of his sure rubbed off on you." Joe said, watching her. "Only he's had a bit more practice."

"I'm sorry?" she asked.

"I saw you deal with being kidnapped and held hostage by Rafe, you stared down Death and you came out of it with a brighter shine in your eye then when I first met you." Joe pushed, not so delicate as Mac had been. "I saw the way you both looked at each other your last night in Paris and you'd both been through hell and back. So don't think this old man's blind just because he has a hard time walking."

She looked horrified he'd think that. "Oh, no. Joe you are wise beyond words. But.. But I love him, and the only way I can figure out to help him is to stay well away from him. I'm stupid and I take chances and he's the one who'll pay with his life, so it's best we just stop now while we can."

Joe looked unimpressed. "And who's idea was that?"

"Mine," she replied, staring at her hands. "He was right. I did make things more dangerous for him. It's time I admitted it and realized I'm just me, a mortal, who doesn't have the strength to wield a blade and can't kill a fly if I'm perfectly honest about it."

"You seemed to hold your own just fine in Turkey. And Simon tells me he would of bet his life you'd been a Watcher when you walked into Headquarters a few days ago." Joe said.

"Oh, you heard about that. Well, I thought it a lark. I should have taken it more seriously."

"I'm sure he was about as giddy about the whole thing as you were till things went wrong, huh?" He asked.

She looked up at him then, measuring him it seemed. "Yes, I thought so. Maybe I misunderstood. I seem to do that a lot."

Joe shook his head sadly. "No you didn't, Sydney. He just forgets you're mortal sometimes, they all do. One minute they're living the best moments of their lives with you, and then something happens, you get hurt and they have to agonize over the fact that they might of been at fault. Or time just keeps trucking on and suddenly you're gone and they have to live through another few centuries asking themselves if they took a different life away from you." Joe sighed and took her hand. "Methos isn't protecting himself, Sydney. He's doing what he thinks is best for you, he's protecting you."

"Oh," she replied. She sat quietly thinking it through, examining the logic of the statements and then the argument. "I see. And why does he think it's his place to decide?"

Joe gave her a long suffering grin. "Because he's an arrogant son of a bitch and he thinks he has the right."

"And I have the right to decide that I need to do what I can to protect him. So far as I can see, the only way I can do that is to stay away from him. Joe, I love him. I don't want to see anything happen to him. If that means staying the hell away from him, then I'll do that."

Joe shrugged, playing the act of defeated party. "It's your call kid. But you gotta ask yourself. You wanted to leave, but did he want you to?"

"Every indicator was that he did, Joe. Maybe a part of him didn't but it's a bit late now."

"Yeah, maybe." Joe sighed and caught the Highlander's eye before he stood. "I got a set to play, you gonna still be here when I'm done?"

"Sure, why not."

Joe smiled. "I'm holding you to that." He said before walking towards the stage. As if on cue, MacLeod came back to the table with drinks, like a changing of the guard.

"Joe already leave?" Duncan asked as he set the drinks he'd been juggling on the table.

"Yeah, he's playing a set. So is this a group effort, guys against the poor defenseless gal?"

"What are you talking about?" Duncan asked nervously.

"Never mind. I understand the rules. I'm surprised you don't wear Brut," Syd replied taking a long drink of her beer. "Just promise to get me home unmolested."

"Believe it or not, we're trying to be your friends, Sydney." Duncan said. "Even if you won't tell me what happened, I didn't mean what I said lightly about being there if you needed me."

"Thanks, Duncan. But in this I don't see how you can be my friend and Methos's and I'd rather you be his. He needs friends and I get the impression he doesn't have all that many."

"I can spend the next decade getting him to talk to me again, I can't do that with you." Duncan said.

"I keep forgetting you guys have this long-run viewpoint. I guess there's a lot of things I don't get. Won't ever get," she added glumly and took a long drink of her beer.

Duncan snorted. "And you think it's any easier for us?"

"Well, you have a lot longer for your learning curve," she pointed out.

"The longer you have to learn doesn't make the lesson any easier." The Highlander mused, looking into his glass. "I've had hundred of mortal lovers and friends over the centuries, and I've had to bury every single one of them. Someday I'll have to do the same for Joe," Duncan said, nodding up at the man on stage. "But I try not to think of that too often. I've loved everyone of them, but it gets harder to let people in with every death and I'm only four hundred. Now add five thousand years to that. No matter how I admire the Old Man, I'd never want to trade places with him."

She stared down into her glass. "I'm amazed any of you ever get involved with mortals."

"You don't choose who you fall in love with."

"Maybe not," she agreed. "But you can choose what to do about it."

"And that doesn't get any easier either." He said with a forced smile, draining his glass.

Joe and the band drove into the first set to the patrons applause, leaving Duncan and Sydney to fall into a contemplative silence, both lost in their own thoughts as the lively blues flowed over them.

If she hadn't promised Joe otherwise, she'd have slipped out and gone home. But then home was as empty as this place was, so what difference would it make, anyway.

Duncan made sure her glass was full and he didn't bring up the subject of Methos again, but as the set began to wind down, Sydney wasn't allowed to forget why she was here.

The crowd applauded as Joe held up his hand and adjusted the microphone. "We're gonna let you all go home sometime tonight," he joked as all but the pianist left the stage and the audience laughed. "But I got one more song for you all, dedicated to a beautiful woman who makes me wish I was at least twenty years younger."

It took Sydney a few precious seconds to realize he was meaning her. She looked up at him and blushed.

Silence fell over the bar as Joe tapped out the beat and the piano started. Joe waited a few bars, the soft tune a startling undertone to his gruff voice.

'Well baby, there you stand...With your little head down in your hand. Oh my god, you can't believe, it's happening again. Your baby's gone and you're all alone, and it looks like the end." Joe crooned, shaking his head sadly.

Sydney stared down at her beer fighting for her composure. She might have headed for the door if Mac's arm wasn't firmly on her chair and, well, she'd promised to stay.

"And you're back out on the street, and you're trying to remember. How will you start it over, you don't know if you can. You don't care much for a stranger's touch, but you can't hold your man." His voice smoothed out, eyes closed. "You never thought you'd be alone, this far down the line. And I know what's been on your mind." Joe looked at her, a soft smile. "You're afraid it all been wasted time."

"The autumn leaves have got you thinking, about the first time that you fell. You didn't love the boy too much, no , no. You just, love the boy too well, well, farewell."

Sydney buried her head in her hands.

"So you live from day to day, and you dream about tomorrow, oh. And the hours go by like minutes and the shadows come to stay. So you, take a little something to make them go away..." A long silence drug out before the piano played on. "And I could have done so many things, baby. If I could only stop my mind, from wonderin' what I left behind, and from worrying 'bout this wasted time."

She got up then and made straight for the ladies room. She could still hear the music but at least there were no eyes on her to see the misery in every line of her face. She stared at her own pale face and willed herself not to cry.

"...I remember what you told me, before you went out on your own: 'sometimes to keep it together, we gotta leave it alone'..." Joe's voice chased her, relentless in it's slow, sad croon. "So you can get on with you search, baby. And I can't get on with mine. And maybe someday we will find...that it wasn't really wasted time..."

Outside the audience cheered while what was left of her heart cracked wide open. It was some time before she felt together enough to venture out of the bathroom and find a way to get home.

She almost lost it when she saw what was waiting for her outside the ladies room door. Duncan MacLeod and Joe Dawson were waiting for her, sympathetic and blocking the exit.

She went with anger because it was safer than anything else she was trying to feel. "So, what, this is what you guys think is friendship?" she demanded. "Just kick me, why don't you?" she hissed, looking from one to the other.

Duncan had the decency to look away but Joe hobbled closer. "You want me to apologize for it, I'm not." Not even blinking at her venom. "I'd rather see you like this then wallowing around, pretending there's nothing wrong. It's not good for you, and it'll eat you up inside if you let it. Don't let it, Sydney."

"Fine. He's forgotten. All right?" she asked him.

Joe shook his head, frowning. "Don't be like that."

She sighed, dashing away a tear that dared to form. "What do you expect? How am I supposed to be. I'd like to know!"

Joe carefully moved closer, putting an old calloused hand on her arm. "Just stop saying you're fine when you're not."

Then she was sobbing and sinking to the floor.

Joe stepped back as Mac swooped in to catch Sydney, pulling her into his arms as she sobbed. The Scot stroked her hair, trying to sooth the woman as his eyes burned into the Watcher.

Joe sighed. "It had to be done." He said unapologetically.

Slowly Sydney's sobs eased. "Happy now?" she asked, but was too tired to even put any fire into the words. "And what, I'm supposed to feel better?"

"No, kid." Joe said. "You're just supposed to feel something."

"That's enough, Joe." Duncan barked, helping Sydney to stand, but not letting the supportive hand drop. "I'm taking her home, now!"

"Please," she begged.

"Go ahead and get your coat, Sydney." Duncan instructed.

Sydney cast a look at the both of them and went to get her coat. At least it would give her a minute to try to get herself together as best she could.

"She's not you, Joe!" Duncan growled.

"I didn't say she was, Mac. But what you expect me to do, they're both stubborn as hell, and neither of them wants to admit when the other's wrong." Joe barked back.

"You don't even know what happened." Duncan reasoned.

"You weren't in Paris."

Duncan's eyes widened. "And that makes you the expert of their love life all of a sudden? I don't think so."

"What are we supposed to do then?" Joe asked.

"Give them time, let them work it out on their own." Duncan said incredibly.

"That's something they don't have!" Joe hissed.

It left them both without anything to say, Joe trying to calm down.

"You didn't see 'em, Mac. Methos may be harsh sometimes, but he wouldn't do this to her intentionally."

"Then we'll just have to wait." Duncan said. "Go home, Joe, calm down. I'll make sure Sydney gets home."

Sydney, her hands gripping her opposite elbows, as if she could hold herself together that way, let Duncan lead her outside and walk her down the street. She was too emotionally drained to find a single word she could say.

They walked the short distance back to Duncan's car and he helped her into the T-bird, letting the silence give her time and the space she needed.

She sank gratefully into the leather seat. closing her eyes.

The trip wasn't long, and Duncan wondered if she had enough time when he shut off the engine. He didn't wait for her to get out, circling the car to open her door and help her out.

She got out of the car and said, "Thanks for bringing me home."

Duncan squeezed her arm supportively. "Do you want me to walk you in?"

"No thanks. Look, I know you guys are trying to help. I just don't know how anything does at this point. So tell Joe I'll try my best not to punch him next time I see him."

"I think that's letting him off little lightly," Duncan joked but nodded. "Call if you need to, even if you don't."

"Thanks, Duncan. But mostly thanks for being his friend." She managed a weak smile, got on tip toe to plant a kiss on Duncan's cheek, and then walked up the stairs to her front entry letting herself in without looking back.

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